Well first I meet a guy who collects *real* spitfires, then the next day I get to go to a private box at Wembley for a free hospitality event. Why does the world hate me so much to taunt me with rich people?

Yes, the hospitality event was football. I’ve never really been a fan, it’s just rubbish to watch and the players are terrible! How can you earn £50,000 a week and be unable to kick a ball from one part of the pitch to a player in another part? How hard can that be for £50K a week!?!? However, Wembley was pretty awesome, I thought it looked a bit small from outside but inside was a different matter. Watching approximately 79,980 (there were 20 of us in our private box) chavs wobbling their bellies in the 30degree sun was most entertaining!

As for the food, mmmm cold fillet steak buffet! That translates to “all the fillet steak you can politely eat without seeming too greedy” woohoo! It was a toss up between the steak and the wine and the parsnip crisps and indecision got the better of me for at least 4 seconds.

Anyway, if anyone would like to buy me a private box at Wembley and give me a sniper rifle then I’d soon rid the world of blubber. p.s. the photo was taken before the stadium bars were closed, therefore mainly empty.